And again...he who has ears, listen to what the Spirit is saying.

I wasn’t expecting this in the least, but I had another dream I would like to share in reference to my previous post. I haven’t even been thinking about this topic very much recently, so I was a little surprised when I had it.

In my dream I was attending a huge outdoor gathering of thousands of Catholics. We were all seated and waiting with great expectation. The Pope was going to speak, and everyone desperately wanted to hear what he had to say. There was a sense that the outcome of this event was of great importance, and the people needed to hear something from him that would put them at ease.

Suddenly he sat in his seat, and it seemed very much like the “throne” of a king to me. His position was very high up above the people. And, he spoke about two sentences and that was it. I do not know what he said, but I remember it was of little substance and seemed to be a formality only. After speaking these two sentences, it was over. Just like that. People began to rise up out of their seats (some staggering in disbelief), and look at each other as if suddenly they had lost their foundation in life. For many, the weight was too heavy to bear. Suddenly where there was once unity, hope, and expectation, there was now confusion. People began to disperse and go in different directions. It was as if a bond was broken, a sacred bond.

The image that breaks my heart and sticks in my mind the most is that of an elderly gentlemen who was seated to the right of me and getting up out of his seat. I looked over at him…and he looked me right in the eyes. There was such pain and hurt in his eyes as he staggered out of his seat. I felt much compassion, and I hurt deeply for him. He was looking for answers, for help with a pleading in his eyes. It was as if he lost everything he believed in, in one short moment. It was gone, all over for him.

Now, I do not have an agenda or mission whatsoever to speak ill of the Catholic Church. But again, I thought it important to share what I have just written. I’ve seen a lot of different things recently, like Catholics announcing they are “proud” to be Catholic.  I find it all rather childish. I’ve also heard that many want to support the pope, or,  are asking for his resignation. I mean for goodness sake, just who and what needs defending here? Truth is truth. Let him who has ears, hear what the Spirit is saying.

The Humility of God

I had a conversation earlier today that reminded me of the humility of God. Sometimes it is hard to imagine an almighty God possessing humble attributes. This is an attribute of God I find difficult to get my head around at times. It seems to me in our human understanding of things; supreme power and a humble disposition simply do not go hand and hand. In each generation and culture God is perceived differently. Even within Christianity, God has been portrayed and perceived in different ways at different times. Most are likely familiar with the patriarchal God, the judgmental God, the distant and impersonal God...and so on. Some may as well think God is an impersonal obscure energy.

A simple definition of humble is as follows:

"Thinking lowly of one's self; claiming little for one's self; not proud, arrogant, or assuming; thinking one's self ill-deserving or unworthy, when judged by the demands of God; lowly; weak; modest."

I don't believe God would require a certain attitude of heart in human beings that He Himself does not possess. As the scriptures say, "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble." (James 4:6) Having a humble attitude doesn't mean we always get it right. It means though, that there is a special grace given by God to those who have an overall humble attitude toward God, themselves, and others.

I had an experience when I was quite a bit younger that I would like to share as I believe it applies in this context. I'm cautious about sharing personal experiences of this nature on a public domain however; as these are always open to interpretation and quite subjective.

Yes, I'm going after the real thing to the best of my ability, so I don't think I'm delusional. With disclaimer complete I will continue.

I was young, not much out of high school and still getting used to living away from home for the first time. In four years time I had experienced enough that caused me to have a lot of questions. I was having a rare existential crisis at 22, not 62. This is a vulnerable age, especially when away from home for the first time. It was like I suddenly became aware with some finality at 22 years of age that there had to be more. It was a sense of feeling called to something greater than myself in my limited understanding of things. I just couldn't shake it. I had a sense I was being called to make a decision.

During this time I had a job in a nursing home and worked as an aid. I actually considered becoming a nurse as a result of my experiences there. I grew up some more very fast during my time there.

A women died while I was holding her hand. I remember the fear in her eyes as she looked directly into mine, and trying to comfort her. After helping another women to the toilet, I sat down on the floor and talked to her for half an hour even though I knew staff were not supposed to do this. I listened to her stories. I went looking for odd objects (at the request of certain residents) that I knew I would never find, and were probably lost years ago. I cleaned a lot of bottoms and met a lot of lonely people. Some of them had lived amazing lives in their prime.

One women in particular caught my attention. For the evening meal I had to go up to the second floor to help with feeding more handicapped patients. I was always assigned to a women named Elizabeth, who was 102 years of age at our first meeting. She could only take her food through a syringe and it had to be the consistency of baby food. She was so gracious, always thanking me after each bite. I remember wiping the excess food that didn't make it in off of her chin. I would try to make conversation with her, and would sometimes ask her if she 'liked' her dinner. She would always respond with a very gracious and enthusiastic, "Oh yes, thank you!"

One day as I was feeding her, the atmosphere of the room suddenly changed. I remember Elizabeth looked straight ahead with an intense focus. The tone of her voice changed as if she had a very important announcement to make. She then said to me, "He loves you more than you know." I was taken off guard at first and said, "Elizabeth, who is he?" Her voice became more pronounced and she said to me, "He is the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End." She said a couple of other things to me, but it's not necessary to mention it here as it is more personal. I don't need to share it to make my point. I knew the Holy Spirit was present, but I didn't know how I knew this, because I didn't know much about a 'holy spirit'.

You could say after an experience like that my life was changed forever.

And I share this for this reason: to give an example of the awesome humility of God. An almighty God could have chosen any way He pleased to communicate with me, or anyone for that matter. If this really was God let's say, He chose to come to me through the humble heart of a gracious and dignified, 102 year old lady in a nursing home. This women was physically in a state of shutting down, but the beauty of who she was on the inside came shining through.

Jesus Himself chose to come to us in a similar manner through His incarnation. He chose to be born in humble circumstances in addition to choosing the humble act of taking on human likeness. He was fully human and divine. That's humility.

"Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for your souls." (Matthew 11:29)

Jesus praised God for His humility when he said:

"I give praise to you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, for although you have hidden these things from the wise and the learned you have revealed them to little ones." (Matthew 11:25)

And finally, how can we possibly leave out the The Beatitudes regarding humility:

Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are the meek: for they shall posses the land.

Blessed are they who mourn: for they shall be comforted.

Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after justice: for they shall have their fill.

Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.

Blessed are the clean of heart: for they shall see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

Blessed are they that suffer persecution for justice' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

We cannot put God in a box obviously, as He is all things to all people. Yes God is patriarchal, but the Spirit of God is also matriarchal. This is why he made us male and female, as this is in His image. God is just, as He is merciful. In reading the scriptures one can see that Jesus was very humble in word and deed, and yet he as well could be quite outspoken and downright shocking when it was required for Him to get His message across. Was he any less humble when He was shocking? No, humility can be speaking the truth in a difficult situation when it's needed. But here is the key, humility is always rooted in.........love, and putting the dignity of another ahead of our own.